Three decades later, Tracy Bonham revives I’m Not A Waif, a blast of alternative rock with a punk attitude that takes aim at the beauty standards and impossible expectations still imposed on women. It first appeared on her 1995 EP The Liverpool Sessions, and, unfortunately for us women, its message has barely aged. So it makes perfect sense that it’s now out as a single and as a bonus track on LIFT, the album on which Bonham revisits her 1996 debut, The Burdens of Being Upright. LIFT is out on 13 November via American Laundromat Records.
The original recording was rawer, but the new version hasn’t lost an ounce of its punk edge. It just sounds cleaner, with more nuance. Over distorted guitars and pounding drums, Tracy Bonham switches from screaming to melodies dripping with sarcasm and lets it all out. She repeats “I’m Not A Waif” over and over, almost like a mantra, until it’s clear she has no intention of playing along with the cult of extreme thinness.
“The supermodel idols of my youth looked like they were strung out on drugs and starving to death. To me, the messaging was clear. I needed to be a waif in order to feel attractive. Nobody would care if I starved myself because they all would rather me be a waif… that is except for my parents.” (Tracy Bonham)
In the video, Bonham shares the screen with Tammy Faye Starlight, a fixture of the New York scene, who plays her most self-critical side. Together they put on a frantic, almost feral send-up, exaggerating every gesture, throwing themselves around with gleeful abandon and laughing off the pressure to be perfect.
In the ’90s, Bonham was saddled with the “Angry Young Woman” label, and it weighed on her so much that she spent years making herself small. Now she’s doing the opposite, owning the anger she was told was a flaw. And just as well, because in the age of Ozempic and the endless pursuit of youth, I’m Not A Waif is needed more than ever.
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